I am imprisoned in Hong Kong for drug trafficking.
From a very young age I have faced many difficulties. My mother is an alcoholic and because of that I was raised in a home where there was no peace.
Without a father figure, I started facing problems. At school, I always had issues with other students. I was a very rebellious teenager but had good grades. I had friendships that introduced me to drugs, and I started using cocaine when I was just 11 years old.
With no one to intervene, I continued down that path and started selling drugs. I started dating a man who encouraged me to run away from home and taught me how to use other types of drugs like heroin, and at 12 years old, I had my first overdose. My boyfriend took me to the hospital and abandoned me there alone, because I was under 18 and hospitalized for an overdose—the responsible adult with me would be held legally accountable. To not take this responsibility, he left me alone at the hospital.
Weak and without strength to defend myself, he beat and raped me, stole all my money and threw me out of the house, dressed only in underwear and a bra.
I could not be discharged unless I had a legal guardian. So I called my maternal grandmother, from whom I had not heard in over a year. My grandmother took me in and cared for me, but I still did not feel happy.
Seeking love in the wrong place, I went back to my boyfriend, who gave me more drugs and this time taught me how to prostitute myself, so I could help with the daily expenses of the house where we lived together. During the day, I sold drugs for my boyfriend, and at night I used drugs to be able to prostitute myself and give him all the money. I thought I was happy, until in 2013, after one late-night appointment, I returned home exhausted and weak. When I arrived, I handed over only half the money I had earned that night. That same night, my boyfriend induced me to inject heroin so I could “rest” better, but his intentions were different. Weak and without strength to defend myself, he beat and raped me, stole all my money and threw me out of the house, dressed only in underwear and a bra.
With the help of a friend who lived on the street, I got some clothes and borrowed money to buy more drugs, trying to forget all the pain and problems. As a consequence, I had another drug overdose.
I was hospitalized for three days until I ran away from the hospital so they wouldn’t call my grandmother. My boyfriend found me and we got back together. The next night he drank so much and beat me until I fainted. Somehow, he took me to the hospital and there, apart from the aftermath of violence, I was having my third overdose, because after fainting he tried to kill me by injecting all kinds of drugs into my veins.
I was in a “medically induced coma” for two months, until, miraculously, I came back to life only to discover that during this period, I had had a miscarriage and had lost a nearly four-month-old baby. The hospital social worker had found my grandmother and informed her of everything I had suffered. After I was discharged, I returned to my grandmother’s house, who taught me to work sewing clothes for other companies. I participated in drug rehabilitation programs and completely gave up any addiction.
The beginning of another nightmare
In 2015, I became pregnant and gave birth to a beautiful, chubby boy weighing 4.56kg.
My life was completely different. I moved in with my child’s father, thinking that I would finally have peace, but it was just the beginning of another nightmare.
The father of my son forbade me from leaving the house, receiving any visitors, even my own family. I couldn’t have a phone and could only call my grandmother when he was with me. I became depressed, and for almost three years lived in that situation.
I decided to separate, even without my son, and sought refuge again with my grandmother. I started working in beauty salons, and it was my grandmother who cared for my son. With her help, I managed to open my own beauty salon in the same house, which for years allowed me to support my son and my grandmother.
In 2020, after the pandemic, my grandmother became very ill, and without anyone to help, I had to work double to pay for her medications and our expenses. In 2023, the situation worsened; my grandmother needed surgery. I decided to borrow money from a very dangerous person and was able to pay for her surgery. But all the medications and expenses kept increasing, as I also had to pay for her transportation and food. Often, I worked in the salon until 3 a.m. to earn enough to pay the surgery’s debt, medications, food, and weekly trips to the hospital.
A “friend” saw all my suffering and said she knew someone who could help me. She introduced me to a man who persuaded me to swallow drugs to transport to Hong Kong—he paid all my debts, and so I could help my grandmother better.
Thinking it would be the best solution, I decided to accept the offer and come to Hong Kong. I ended up arrested, just another mule among many out there. He used my vulnerability to take advantage; I was just another victim.
I’d give anything to go back, because despite all the difficulties, I was close to my son and grandmother, supporting them as much as I could. We were happy. I’m afraid I’ll never see them again, now I’ve lost the chance to watch my son grow and share moments with my grandmother.
I’m warning everyone not to make the same mistake I did. Even in life’s difficulties, we can find another way out. Don’t give up! Value your family and cherish every second. Those who offer easy money only take advantage of your vulnerability for their own gain and then throw you away like trash. Our freedom is worth much more. I am afraid and know what I am losing; I don’t wish this pain on anyone.
Don’t choose the easy way out, because the price will be far greater.
Cherish every second with your family. My grandmother is in need, and from here, I can’t do anything.
Think carefully before acting.
Note: This letter was translated and edited from the original in Portuguese. Switch language to read the original version.